Letters to Myself.

in everything…

i just want to praise you

lift my hands and say i love you…

you are everything to me.

and i will bless your holy name. i will bless your holy name.. i will bless your holy name on high.

idk

i dont know where i am going from here…. i am unsure and unclear about many things. but i choose to trust in the Lord. lately, i’ve been struggling … the post-grad life isn’t as easy as i thought it’d be. and i’ve gotten to the point of desperation.. just give me a job, any job. but i know that God is working.. he knows what’s best for me and in his sovereignty, will provide something suitable for me. it’s just the waiting that’s hard. especially since ive been sooo used to depending on working myself for finances. He really is Jehovah Jireh, and I will believe in ALL of who He is.

..and now the question of which career path to take.

reverent fear of the Lord…

…often times shows itself through obedience, so if God says to do something, do it. (:

God’s word to me:

spend your mornings in the Word.

“dependence” (:

am i gonna make it??

the things we must do to survive.. some days just seem harder than others. the harsh reality of life is beginning to blur my vision. so the question is: do i pursue what i love to do or do i take the practical approach in order to ensure my survival??

nowadays, it seems like most people are taking the practical approach. but everyone’s, for the most part, at a standstill because the economy has taken a hit. it’s become that much harder for individuals to market to themselves into the field of their choice. it’s become harder for me to choose  to push myself into the goals i have/ once had.

i thought i was an optimist. well apparently, i am an optimist whose optimism is waning. but when i hear stories of people who have reached their dreams and are living out the lives that they once dreamed, i am so inspired. and i hope for that same blessing in my life because in the end, i want to live a passionate, purposeful life.

oyy. i need help jesus.

yesterday, i…

realized how much my fears and insecurities have crippled my choices. but even though i know they’re there and have recognized the problem, it’s still scary. i thought the hard part was supposed to be the acceptance and the admittance of a problem… getting over the denial part.. yadda yaddaa yada. but apparently, step 2 is just as hard.

so, to lay it out simply… step 1: recognize the problem. step 2: overcome the problem (??)

am i pushing it…  being a tad overeager? should there be a step 1.5 to help me get to step 2??  ugh, when will this become easy……

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note to self: i will not let my fears get in the way of my life.